Alone This Christmas
by Becky3
Summary: It's Christmas time in Tree Hill and everybody is spending it with the people they care about. Everybody but one person.


Summary: It's Christmas time in Tree Hill and everybody is spending it with the people they care about. Everybody but one person.

A/N- This story takes place after the car crash off the bridge and Haley finding out she's pregnant but I made that happen before Christmas.

Here I am walking through the hallways of Tree Hill High….alone. Everyone is paired off except for me. To my right, Nathan walks Haley to the tutoring center with his toned arm wrapped around her shoulder. Lucky girl. To my left Lucas is smiling at Brooke, who is whispering something slutty in his ear. The two of them got back together not long after Lucas and Peyton broke up. Peyton realized that she wasn't really in love with him and that she just thought she was because he had saved her so many times. She actually is in Savannah right now with Jake. It was probably a long distance booty call. She'll be back to Tree Hill in time for Christmas.

So where was I when they were giving out boyfriends? Even Mouth has somebody. I should have gone out with him so at least I would have somebody. This is going to be a long day.

"Rachel!" Haley yells at me breaking me away from my thoughts as I stroll into the tutoring center late. She can be quite bossy and bitchy when she wants to be.

"You bellowed?" I smirk at her.

"You know I really don't have to do this. I can just leave now and go to work at the Café and you can fail calculus. That would be fine with me," she says in a huff.

"Chill out Haley," I say sitting down at the table and opening up my textbook. "Look I'm ready. Oh look a derivative," I say with fake enthusiasm.

The woman sighs and sits down next to me and tries explaining the problem to me. Ok so I can see why she doesn't want to help me, after all I did try to steal her husband. It wasn't like I was trying to waste her time now though. It's just that with the holidays coming up and everyone all coupley a girl gets lonely. Truth behold I was thinking about Cooper and how much I miss him. I wish he could have stayed around. We could have worked things out and then I would have had somebody too.

After a grueling hour of calculus (when will I ever use that crap anyway?) I drove home. My thoughts went back to Cooper. Now and then I think about him. Maybe the reason things didn't work out is because of the things I've done. I can't say that I'm an angel. I mean I did open the time capsule that resulted in the school shooting. Then I tried to steal Nathan from Haley. I also told the whole school that Brooke was pregnant. I'm human and we all make mistakes sometimes. On the other hand, I stopped pursuing Nathan when I found out Haley was pregnant. I even helped Nathan come to terms with being a father. I gave Brooke a place to live when she had nowhere to go. I helped Brooke get back with Lucas after showing her what a bad person Mr. Chavez was. I've done some good things. Maybe Santa Claus will take notice of that and bring me Cooper for Christmas. If not him I think I could settle for a new Louis Vuitton purse.

I go inside my huge house. It's so quiet and it just feels lonely. My parents are away on some business trip and won't be back until after the first of the New Year. Guess I'll be spending the holidays alone. They'll try and make it up to me by buying me some extravagant present like a car or some diamond earrings. Maybe that's why I can't love. That and guys only want one thing. Sex.

Well just because I have no family to celebrate Christmas with doesn't mean that I can't celebrate. Hell, I can throw a Christmas party and just have fun. I'll throw one for New Years too.

I go into the living room and throw my bag on the couch. If I'm celebrating Christmas I better decorate. I head downstairs to the basement and search around for the boxes mark X-MAS. Finding them under some other boxes I bring them upstairs to the spacious living room. I wipe the dust off one of the boxes and open it up. Inside are branches of various sizes ready to be put up to form a tree.

An hour later I have the artificial tree up in the corner with white lights and garland strung around it. I have the light up icicles hanging from the ceiling to make it look like an ice palace. I smile as I open up the box of ornaments when I hear the front door open and high heels clicking as they move along the hardwood floor.

Brooke Davis throws her pink messenger bag on the couch and looks around at my handy work. "Wow Rachel you did a great job."

I smirk. "I know."

Brooke shakes her head and chuckles. "Way to be modest."

"Modesty is overrated. Besides I did a damn good job so I should say so."

"Want some help with those ornaments, friend?" she asks coming closer to the tree.

"Wash your hands first. I don't want your dirt all over them."

Brooke rolls her eyes and goes into the box pulling out some gold ornaments. She pulls out a Christmas ball and places it on one of the branches as I take out another ornament.

"Got tired of brooking Lucas?"

"First of all we weren't 'brooking.' We were just hanging out and talking."

"Sure you were."

"We were. You're just jealous because you don't know what a real relationship with a guy is since all you do is have sex with a guy," Brooke spits out. Ouch that one hurt.

I glare at her and remain silent as I keep putting up ornaments. The brunette quickly understands that what she said hurt me and gives me sympathetic eyes. "I didn't mean that Rachel."

"Sure you did Brooke. I'm just a slut nobody can love." I never look at her and give the tree in front of me all my attention.

I feel a hand on my shoulder. "I'm sorry Rachel."

I shrug. "Whatever. So when are you going to California to see your parents?"

Brooke watches me a bit with her brown eyes before going back to decorating the tree. "Right after class I'm going to the airport on our last day of school before break. When are your parents coming home?"

"Oh they called yesterday and said they wouldn't be able to make Christmas this year. Apparently I just don't come up on their list of priorities."

My friend frowns at that. "You're welcome to come with me to California."

I shake my head. "Nah I'll just stay here and have Lucas keep me company. Ooh I like that idea." I say with a big grin.

"Ha ha. Seriously though, my parents won't mind you staying with us."

"I'll be fine Penelope," I say calling Brooke by her middle name as I try to brush off her feelings of sympathy for me. "Don't worry about me. You just have to help me plan a kick ass party before you leave."

"As much as I like a party I can't. I leave in 3 days and I have to get this stupid English paper finished. Then I have to pack for California and that will take a day by itself. Besides I think it might a little short notice. People have plans for the holidays already."

"We'll see tomorrow," I reply putting the last ornament on the tree. We both step back and turn off all the lights to just look at the Christmas lights shining brightly. It all looked so beautiful and brought some Christmas spirit to me. I held hope inside of me that my other friends would want to have a party.

The next day at school I ask my friends if they're up for coming to a party. Nathan and Haley are driving out to where her parents' RV is parked to visit them. Lucas wants to spend time with Brooke alone before she leaves. Peyton isn't back yet. Everyone has plans. Great.

Through out the school day I heard everyone talking about their plans for their Christmas break. People going skiing with their family while others are staying in to just enjoy each others company. I feel like I'm in some syndicated Christmas special but instead of feeling all jolly I end up relating to Ebenezer Scrooge.

After a long day it was just good to go home. Haley cancelled tutoring today which was just fine by me. I hear giggles coming from outside of the bedroom Brooke and I share which only meant that Brooke was with Lucas. I sigh and turn around to go back downstairs. I see a picture of Cooper and I on the little table in the hallway. Not thinking I pick up my cell phone and call him as I head downstairs to the kitchen.

"Hey Cooper. I know I'm the last person you want to hear from, but I just want you to know that I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry I lied about my age. I'm sorry I pulled the wheel of the limo and that I told you I was pregnant. You just mean a lot to me and I care about you and I didn't want to lose you. We had a connection and it was more that just sex. At least I thought we did. Anyway I hope you have a Merry Christmas and maybe one day you can forgive me." I hang the phone up after leaving that message on Cooper's voice mail saying the words my heart was telling me to say. Watch him just delete it.

I go to leave the kitchen and bump into Lucas. "Spying on me, Scott?"

He holds his hands up in defense. "I was just getting something to snack on. I wasn't trying to spy on you calling Cooper."

"See you were listening!" I said pointing a finger at him.

"You miss him huh?" he asks as he pours a glass of milk for himself.

I cross my arms and lean against the door way. "Yeah I do. I really cared about him Luke but it's just like I told you. Guys only want one thing."

He grabs the plate of cookies that was sitting on the marble kitchen counter and comes over by me and puts his hand on my shoulder. "Not all guys. Look at me and Brooke. It's more than just sex." I stay quiet thinking about what he said. "You'll find the right guy Rach."

Lucas leaves me and once again I'm alone.

"Bye Rachel," Brooke hugs me outside in the parking lot of Tree Hill High. "Are you sure you don't want to come with me."

I hug her back. "I'm sure. Have a good Christmas."

"Thanks you too. Don't eat too many cookies so you'll have to get lipo again," she laughs.

"I won't Bitchy Davis," I say with a giggle.

"You two are so kind to each other," Lucas says coming up behind us to say goodbye to his girlfriend.

"We have a special relationship. Have a safe flight Brooke. Merry Christmas guys," I say as I pat Lucas on the back and get into my car and drive home.

I go inside and turn on the Christmas lights. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve and I'm all alone. It's been so good having Brooke staying at my place because somebody is here with me. I don't even have a pet to cuddle up to. I go and make myself a sandwich and decide that I'm not sitting around by myself tonight. I go upstairs and look into my closet and find a tight green corset top and black mini skirt. Perfect outfit.

I go to the club I go to frequently when I want to meet guys. I find an attractive man with sandy hair leaning against the bar sipping a margarita. He's about 28 I'd say. I sashay over to him and flirt my way to getting a mudslide from him. I can see the lust in his eyes as he glances down my top and in matter of minutes we're back at his place having sex. After he falls asleep I grab my clothes and head back home.

When I get home I feel lonelier than before. Sure the sex was good, great even. That's all it was though. There was no connection. Just two people trying to find pleasure.

They next day, Christmas Eve, I stay in bed all day not wanting to do anything. By four o'clock my stomach is growling so loud that I go down to make something quick for dinner to silence it. Looks like fish sticks and macaroni and cheese are on the menu tonight. I take my dinner into the living room with the only light in the room coming from the Christmas decorations.

I turn on the TV and flip to Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. I watch some other Christmas shows before falling asleep on the couch and when I wake up it's 1 in the morning. I yawn and realize that it's Christmas.

"Merry Christmas, Rachel," I mutter and shut the television off. I start to head up to my room as I call my voice mail to see if I have any messages. I must have never heard the phone ring while I was sleeping because I have three messages.

"Hey Rach, your dad and I just want to wish you a Merry Christmas even though it isn't Christmas there yet it is here in England. We love you very much and wish we were with you…." Heh then why didn't you have me fly out or postpone your business trip? Hearing enough I cut my mom's message off and go to the next one.

"Hey Rachel!" Brooke's cheery voice comes over the phone. "It's Christmas there in Tree Hill and I wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas! Call me back tomorrow! Bye." I shake my head and chuckle at how happy and cheerful she can be.

I go to the next message and almost drop the phone when I hear a man's voice. It wasn't just any man's voice. It was Cooper.

"It's me. I got your message and I think I can forgive you now. It took me a few months to get to that point. I want you to know that nothing can happen between us. You're 17 and I'm 30. Meet somebody your own age and stop trying to be older than you are. Enjoy being young. Merry Christmas, Rachel. I hope you're not alone."

I smile at his message. His tone was calm and soothing. I can hear that he does care about me even if it's just a small amount. If he didn't he would have never called back, wish me a good Christmas, or hope that I'm not alone. Those last few words keep repeating in my head as I get into my bed and I smile. Suddenly I don't feel as lonely anymore.

A/N- That's it. Let me know what you think.


End file.
